What does the term 'mental health' mean to you? It's a question worth exploring as it can generate more clarity and self-awareness, not just in terms of what you would like to resolve but how you would like to experience life.
Mental health is not just about the absence of stress, anxiety or depression, but more about mental and emotional states that we aspire to such as happiness, love, fulfilment, or a sense of contentment. It also relates to increased mental and emotional resilience which allows us to bounce back from stress and challenging situations more quickly.
Although it may sound counterintuitive, some stress is actually good, or even necessary. A little stress can prompt us to take action when it is required, for example, to study for an important exam or to challenge ourselves in some way; in other words, it is motivating. But whilst a certain amount of stress can be helpful, too much stress results in an overloaded nervous system which can become detrimental to our health, especially if it is chronic, and we then need to find ways to relieve and/or overcome it.
The purpose of this article is not so much to give you 'tips' on how to improve your mental health, but more to help you recognise the resources that are already available inside you; to help you tap into the innate capacity you have to transform your experience of life.
Below are some of the resources I've used to improve and maintain my own mental health, alongside Homeopathy. In my next blog I will be talking specifically about Homeopathic medicines that can help with anxiety.
Notice Your Thoughts
What good does that do?! Actually, this is critically important as it helps us to stop swimming in the morass of the tens of thousands of thoughts we have every day, the majority of which are quite negative.
If there is a you that can notice your thoughts, then clearly you're not your thoughts.
Getting some distance between ‘us’ and our thoughts can be the first step to recognising that we are Conscious beings, and have much more choice over the nature of our experience than perhaps we had previously believed.
“Awareness is the Greatest Agent for Change” - Eckhart Tolle
Get Present
In other words, be where your body is, be where your feet are. This is often easier said than done because we are so used to living in our heads, regretting the past or worrying about the future.
The most effective way that I know of to re-establish life in the present moment is to take up a simple and effective form of meditation. It can be as simple as starting with five minutes a day. Nobody is telling you you have to sit cross-legged, burn incense or chant mantras for hours a day!
There are many studies highlighting the virtues of meditation and its innumerable health benefits, notably that of heart health. Meditation can help us to become more aware of our painful thoughts and emotions, stop identifying with them and let them go. In my experience, suffering only happens when I resist something - meditation has shown me that if I can just allow things to be as they are (for example, painful emotions) then resolution follows much more naturally and easily.
As a natural byproduct of meditation, you may find that you're more able to be accepting of things in your life that you previously found to be difficult or challenging.
(NB; meditation may not be suitable or appropriate for those with more severe mental conditions).
Reframe
Consciously choosing to reframe thoughts that seem unpleasant, unhelpful or painful can be a great way to change your mind about things, and therefore create a more enjoyable experience of life. For example, that miserable rainy day could be the perfect opportunity to cosy up on the sofa with a book or a loved one.
This way we can use our thoughts as a red flag to make a different choice, to use them as a catalyst to take us towards what we do want.
By extension, finding meaning in adversity is one of the most powerful ways to transform difficult or painful experiences. This is the meaning of spiritual alchemy; transforming base metals into gold. It's the difference between seeing life as something that happens to us, and seeing life as something that happens for us.
"If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change" - Dr.Wayne Dyer
Your Heart’s Desire
If I had a magic wand and I could give you one thing, what would it be?
What is your highest desire in life? Getting clear on this is essential because once you get clear on what you truly want then making decisions becomes a lot simpler; is the choice I'm making taking me closer towards what I want or further away from it?
It's like setting your GPS for life; if we are more focused on where we want to go then we are naturally mobilised to go in that direction. As I alluded to earlier, learning to be present will help you get clearer on this.
I'm very passionate about this because the net result is that we start to make choices that serve us and others. It could be around seemingly bigger decisions, like starting or ending a relationship or job, or something like spending more time in nature, deciding to get more fresh air and exercise or eating a slightly healthier diet.
Do More Of What Makes You Happy
Doing more of what brings you enjoyment naturally produces feel-good hormones like serotonin and dopamine. In this state we are more likely to make better choices. We can make decisions, small and large, that serve us and those around us.
Doing more of what we love naturally brings us back into the present moment and out of negative or destructive thought patterns. From here we can make more of an empowered choice, to be free of the shackles of past conditioning, and create more of what we want in our life. Being in the present moment allows us to open up to the possibilities that life has on offer - opportunities that previously we may have missed because we were stuck in our heads.
If you genuinely feel there is nothing that you like doing then perhaps this is a good opportunity to find out and start exploring some options about what would bring more joy into your life. So....what would bring more joy into your life?
Decide to Care for Yourself
Please, give yourself permission to care for yourself! If you're going to fulfil your hearts desire then you need to look after yourself - as the Norwegian saying goes, you can't chop wood with a blunt axe! There's a reason why, in case of an emergency on-board an aeroplane, airlines ask you to put your oxygen mask on first.
Who Gives?
Consciously choosing to be of service, even in a small way, is invaluable because it is another means of connecting and dissolving any sense of separation. It also has the effect of getting us out of self-absorption. Being part of a community, large or small, provides us with the perfect opportunity to connect with others and start giving.
Kindness is King
I believe that what goes around comes around and I can see from my own experience that when I make a conscious choice to give more kindness to those around me, whether they're strangers or loved ones, then it comes back. More often than not, when I smile at somebody, they smile back. Giving and kindness are essential for living a happy, healthy life because they engender meaning and cooperation and because they have their roots in love and compassion. As the Dalai Lama apparently said, “Compassion is the wish to see others free from suffering......Love and compassion are necessities, not luxuries. Without them, humanity cannot survive.”
“Love and kindness are never wasted. They always make a difference. They bless the one who receives them, and they bless you, the giver.” – Barbara De Angelis.
Strengthen your Gratitude Muscle
Somebody very wise once said that we live where our attention is, and my experience consistently confirms this to be true. By practising gratitude we shift our attention from what we perceive to be wrong with ourselves, our lives and the world to the things that we are blessed with.
Even thinking of just 5 things that you are grateful for before you go to sleep each night can create a radical shift in perspective. Writing them down or putting them in your phone is even more powerful, and again in my experience, creates a groundswell of gratitude that can genuinely and permanently transform negative thought patterns, and open the door to a more enjoyable and loving experience of life.
Help me Out!
Its okay to ask for help if you need to! There are so many reasons not to do it, for example, I'm a bloke and I don't do that; I don’t need help, I'll be fine, I'll just crack on; I don't want to look stupid; I should be able to do it on my own; I don't want to be a burden to anybody; I don't have anybody to talk to, etc. These are just habitual thoughts that we need to challenge - limiting beliefs that do not serve us.
There is great strength in vulnerability, and reaching out - however uncomfortable it may be - results in solutions and increased peace of mind and enjoyment of life.
Vulnerability is courage in action!
More importantly though, it re-establishes connection. This is far-reaching because it is often a sense of separation that caused the problem in the first place, especially if you have a tendency to bottle things up.
You could simply start by googling mental health or meditation resources and/or apps (Orcha website reviews health apps), speaking to a family member, your spouse or a friend, or speaking to a therapist, Homeopath, or your GP.
One Baby Step
If you are feeling overwhelmed with stress, fear or anxiety then taking one small action, one baby step can be enough to start you moving in the right direction, ie, out of pain and suffering and towards your highest desire.
A good question to ask here is, what can I do? I love this because it presupposes that you can do something - which, of course - you can. It could be something as simple as getting onto Google and doing some research on therapists in your area or tips on mental health, or simply picking up the phone and calling a trusted friend or family member.
“Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has a genius, magic, and power in it.” - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe